Bewilderment

Normally I am annoyed when students act like morons, but I have a particular student this semester who has behaved in ways that are...well...astounding! I am genuinely baffled. It has gone far beyond mere annoyance because annoyance is usually accompanied by some level of understanding. This student's behavior is so nonsensical that my mind has entered into the territory of utter bewilderment.

To start with, she was approximately 20 to 30 minutes late for (a 50 minute) class multiple times throughout the semester. I should have failed her for excessive tardy accumulation, but I guess I was being pretty lenient about the tardies this semester. Anyway, one day she came in mildly late and didn't sign the roll sheet. I asked her if she had come in after it had gone around the class, and she said that it was still going around when she came in but that it didn't get to her. It didn't get to her. Apparently it was this inanimate object's job to make its way directly into her hands as opposed to the other way around. God forbid she get off her ass and do something for herself. One can surmise that this girl has had trouble signing the roll sheet all semester. I cannot count how many times I reminded the entire class, and then her specifically, that if they do not sign the roll sheet, they will be counted absent. Her response was always, "Ooh," after which she proceeded to...NOT SIGN THE ROLL SHEET.

We have been teaching ancient rhetoric in place of Freshman composition this semester. Progymnasmatas are ancient Greek exercises for young rhetoricians. We had 3 due this semester, and they were the only major assignments due aside from the final project. They, along with the final project, comprise 50 percent of the students' overall grades. This particular student failed all of them. She either did not turn them in at all or she turned in incomplete versions of them. Each exercise had 3 parts to it. When returning the third and final progymnasmata to her, I noted that she got an F because it was incomplete. It was a third the length it should have been because she only completed one of the three parts. Her response to this was, "Ooh. We were supposed to do the other parts too?" The other parts. Definite pronoun, meaning she knew there were two other parts to the assignment, she just thought they were optional, I suppose. This was the third and final exercise, mind you. I said, "Yes. That was the assignment. It has been virtually the same assignment all semester, all 3 times." Her response, "Ooh."

The students were able to rewrite one of the three progymnasmatas for a better grade by the end of the semester. The only stipulation was that the original grade had to be a D or higher. They could not rewrite any assignment for which they received an F for incompleteness or failure to turn it in in the first place. This student not only turned in a rewrite despite the fact that she failed all three exercises, but it wasn't even a rewrite of one of the three exercises available for rewrite. It was a rewrite of a daily assignment, all of which were COMPLETION GRADES, meaning it was a 100 if they did it and a zero if they didn't. Obviously, if she was rewriting it, the original grade was a zero. Allow me to recap: the rewrite was for an assignment not available for rewrite (as she could not have rewritten any of the progymnasmatas she failed), and it was a rewrite of a failed grade anyway. Double fail. But it gets better. The rewrite she turned in was executed INCORRECTLY. She did not follow the instructions for the original assignment, so she wouldn't have gotten credit for it anyway. Triple fail. She rewrote an assignment that was not available for rewrite on two levels, and she rewrote it incorrectly.

It seems to me that this student's problem is that she is COMPLETELY INCAPABLE of following simple instructions or listening to them in the first place. My instructions for all assignments and class policy was gone over extensively and repeatedly in class and then was posted online at their Blackboard page. I have had plenty of morons come through my classes in the past. It is neither surprising or incomprehensible. The level of which this student has bombed everything she has attempted, however, is amazing to me. I've never seen anything like it. I've had students blame me and/or everything/one else on the planet for their own fuck-ups. I've had multiple students simply stop showing up halfway through the semester without dropping the class thereby failing. I've had students bomb multiple assignments while at least having the maturity to take responsibility for their mistakes.

But this is the first time I've had a student screw up this badly while seeming to be completely unaware that she's screwing up. It's as if there is an incomplete circuit in communication. I provide information, but it's not getting to her just as the roll sheet didn't get to her. But while she's obviously not taking responsibility for her part in this class, she is also not blaming me or anyone else for her failure. She's simply not acknowledging it at all. It doesn't seem that she's apathetic. She is attempting to complete and turn in assignments. She comes to class, late or not. It seems as though she is just incapable of performing the necessary functions to succeed in this environment, and she's so unaware of what that even means, that she is also incapable of acknowledging failure. Unfortunately, the result of that reality seems to be that she will never be able to learn or progress in any environment in which she must perform any function beyond basic motor skills.

Teaching a Freshman level core class at a typical state university has been an eye-opening experience. I am constantly confronted with various levels of intelligence. There are the A students (few and far between, unfortunately) who are bored with the class because of the need to also cater to the students who are struggling to pass. There are the C students who may be amazing mathematicians or engineers but have no interest in the humanities. They pass with a C, and they are happy. There are the students who are simply not ready for college because they are far from adulthood despite their age. They are not unintelligent necessarily. They are just irresponsible. This student, however, is the first I've had who I would actually consider to be borderline mentally challenged. It is the end of the semester, and I still don't know how to communicate with her. I don't know why I am so baffled by her. If I am (rarely) confronted with the highly intelligent, then it makes sense that I would also be confronted with those on the opposing end of the spectrum. Interestingly, I'm not surprised that she got into college. The work that she has completed is not bad. It's comprehensible, coherent and even somewhat insightful at times. It's as if her dysfunctionality exists entirely within the realm of communication. Roll sheets don't get to her. Information about assignments and policy doesn't get to her. Vital reminders to avoid class failure do not get to her even when they are proverbially placed in her lap. This is what I simply do not understand.