Throwing the Woobie on the Fire

Though the title of my blogspot is intended to be facetious, this first post actually is one of serious subject matter. I didn't intend for it to work out that way; it just did. Hilarity will likely ensue in due time, but for now:

Disclaimer: Rest assured that no names or personal information of individuals mentioned in this blog will be given here. Also, if you are offended by my rantings, go read someone else's. Thank you.

I was 14 years old when I found out that my paternal grandfather was an alcoholic. I had never met him and knew little to nothing about him prior to this discovery. This may explain my father's aversion to alcohol. Anyway, this information had apparently made its way through the grapevine of extended family before it got to me. I was, I believe, understandably livid and somewhat embarrassed - not regarding his alcoholism, but rather because I seemed to be the last one to know.
Accusations had been made regarding my brother's integrity and I made some comment regarding the informer's alcoholic family history which I shouldn't have. You see, I believed, and still do, that the men in my immediate family are some of the best husbands and fathers I have ever encountered and am vigilant in defending their reputation, not that it is often challenged. I had never known alcoholism intimately growing up. The comment I made, however, though out of line and unnecessary, was nonetheless true. Though my memory is fuzzy as to what was actually said, it likely pertained to something of this nature:

People talk about alcoholism as a disease. Alcoholics, along this line of reasoning, are its victims. Alcoholics Anonymous suggests investing faith in a higher power and relinquishing a certain amount of control. While I believe that relinquishing control or understanding that much of what we experience in this world is not within our sphere of power as individuals is beneficial, relinquishing responsibility is not. Alcoholism is not a disease. Alcoholics are not victims. Alcoholism, like drug addiction, food addiction, World of Warcraft addiction, etc., is....an addiction! It is a choice. Just as we choose addiction over proverbial mirror-gazing, we can instead choose the latter. Saying that alcoholism is a disease, or that the fate of our lives is in God's hands, or that the death of a child resulting in his running into a street of oncoming traffic is a tragic accident rather than parental neglect, is a cop out. It is no one else's job to wipe our asses for us.
I am not saying that taking a long, hard look in that proverbial mirror is easy. I have, as an adult, known alcoholism intimately. I have loved those who, at one time or another, would rather have stuck a gun in their mouths and pulled the trigger than quit drinking. Throwing off our crutches, taking off the training wheels and throwing the woobie on the fire is never easy. It can be down-right terrifying. That does not mean, however, that it is impossible, that it is not within our power as individuals.
This issue extends far beyond the reach of alcoholism. Your kid did not die in a tragic accident. You weren't doing your job. If you are addicted to cheeseburgers, that is your choice. But if your eight-year-old is morbidly obese, that is child abuse. If you are planning to be sexually active, you better damn well know how to pronounce and define the word "contraceptive." I'm am not trying to be unduly punitive. I realize that perfection is a fantasy and that we all fuck up from time to time. I certainly have and do. I like to think, however, that I am not afraid of the looking-glass. Some people have never seen it and do not even know it exists. This rant is directed toward them. It is a cop out to think of oneself as "only human." Why do we not think of humanity as an achievement? as the soul's manifestation of excellence? We should be proud of our humanity, not of our ignorance. We have huge lumps of gray matter that we lug around in our skulls that are capable of amazing feats of brilliance, and yet most of us rarely use them. At what point will we accost that man, who may or may not actually have a miniscule penis, and say, "No! Parking your gargantuan truck in 4 spaces simultaneously is not acceptable!" It is time for us to take personal responsibility for our lives. It is time for us to recognize that it is of supreme benefit to ourselves and others to turn on our brains, wipe our own asses and get off the pot!